I had a good weekend. And one of the best things about returning to work this Monday is that I DO NOT have improv practice tonight, which means I get to go home right after work and DO WHATEVER I WANT. This is very exciting to me.

Usually, I have improv practice every Monday night. It's the worst night to have to have any standing obligation, in my opinion, but it's the best night for everyone on my team, myself included, schedule-wise. So Mondays it is. But because the year is winding down and we'll have a couple weeks off improv shows; and also because we are having a big holiday party at the theater, instead of our usual Wednesday night improv shows this week, we don't really need to have practice this Monday. We'll have one final practice of the year next Monday, and then we're done practicing until 2009. Wahoo! I like improv practice, but I also like to take breaks from it. Bigtime.

Along those lines, coaching last Thursday was a lot of fun. I was a bit trepidatious going into it - since I'd never done it before. But it was very easy and came very naturally and I didn't feel underqualified or like I didn't know what I was talking about once in the 2 hours, so that was good. I definitely came in prepared, so that I felt like I had a schedule to fall back on if shit hit the fan, but it was perfectly fine, the ladies on the team were lovely and talented and I left feeling good about what we'd done. (And it was nice to have a little extra cash in my pocket!;)

Anyway, tonight, I'm going to go straight home after work. Sometimes I use unusual nights off like this to get in a long gym workout, but few and far between are the days that I get to leave for home directly from the office. I think that's probably happened a total of 5 times since I moved in with Kevin. Out of probably about 100 days worked since then. Oof. So I'm taking advantage of it tonight. It's honestly one of the most wonderful little pleasures. For the evening, I don't feel like a chicken with her head cut off, running around from point A to B, scarfing down some random dinner as I walk to a rehearsal (which cannot be good for digestion). So tonight I'm gonna go home, finish decorating our Christmas tree (!), make myself a healthy supper, perhaps do some light pilates, watch as many episodes of House (my new favorite show ever) as I can stand before I get too tired to keep my eyes open, and then I'm going to go to bed early.

I won't actually arrive home until 8pm and I'd LOVE to be in bed by 11, so I'm not sure how I'll cram all that in. I'll see where the night takes me.

Going to sleep early-ish tonight is imperative. I went to bed really late last night and I am tired today. My sleep schedule was all out of whack last week too, so I'm trying to reset things.

Weekend recap: Friday night I left work and went straight to Port Authority to meet up with Kevin so we could catch a bus to Edgewater, New Jersey. (Only a few minutes drive from Manhattan.) Our good friend Ian turns 35 today so his girlfriend was throwing him a birthday party on Friday night in this big party room at their new apartment complex. It was super fun. We got to see a bunch of Kevin's old friends - people we hadn't seen in a long time, and even more people he hadn't seen in a really long time. It was great to catch up with everyone I already knew and to meet people I'd only ever heard about. I also got preeeettty drunk on some sangria and a beer, so that was fun. I haven't been drunk in eons. There were plenty of snacks at the party, which I definitely enjoyed. But not having had dinner, it basically evened itself out. There were certainly a few handfuls of things that I took once the alcohol took over my system that I wouldn't have chosen to eat otherwise, but it was fine.

Kevin took lovely care of me once we left. I was goofy and unbalanced, but he was great about it. We had a really nice bus ride back to the city and a pretty uneventful subway ride home to Brooklyn. I did start to feel sick on the subway, once I closed my eyes, but it was fine. I fell asleep and woke up to him pulling me off the train at our stop. I passed out AGAIN on our bed, fully clothed, and he woke me up a few minutes later, helped me get ready for bed, adorably laid out my pajamas for me to put on, and put me to sleep. What a darlin. You'd think I'd had a ton to drink, but it was really only 1.5 sangrias, a beer, and a couple other sips. It had just been so long since I'd had any alcohol. I was silly. But it was fun.

I thought I was really gonna be hurtin when I woke up the next day, but we slept really late (which was essential) and got up and made a big breakfast (er, Kevin made a big breakfast), which seemed to make everything right. We relaxed while watching another House episode. (I'm beyond addicted, I watched 5 episodes this weekend alone.)

And then! We set out on a very long workout. 2 hours later, we were back home. We walked fast or ran the whole time. Twice around the park. It was a bit chilly but so enjoyable. We talked a lot, got in a great workout, and I felt fantastic when we got home. I was tired and hungry but I also felt very alive. A nice long workout like that was exactly what I needed to absolve myself of any guilt I had about the night before's antics.

We had to head out to HST practice/show shortly after that and I came straight home after the show to watch more House (wow). I was up LATE again. Watching House.

I also slept late on Sunday. I had big plans for a workout, a trip to the store, an apartment clean, and to finish trimming the tree (we had a minor setback with the lights which has to be remedied by buying more lights - there aren't presently enough lights for my tastes). We ALSO had to go see the Bodies exhibit at 3.

After I woke up late, we basically got ready, made some coffee with our new coffee machine, which has changed our lives (we haven't had a working coffee machine in the house forever), and headed to the exhibit. It was COLD yesterday - YUCK. But we managed. We had a great time. The South Street Seaport, where the exhibit is located, has tons of great shops and stuff to see, so it was really nice just to be out and about, taking in the sites. We love doing stuff like that together. We grabbed a quick lunch to hold us over until we could eat something more substantial after the exhibit, and then we headed in.

The exhibit was very interesting and informative. I loved it. It was definitely gross at points, especially seeing the cancerous stuff and the malformed organs. Even certain cross sections of the healthy bodies were a bit hard to look at. But you get over it, of course. And it's just fascinating as hell. Who knew the body was this complicated. I mean, you KNOW, but you don't really realize until you see it with your own two eyes like this. I will never forget the experience.

We left after not too long (another nice feature is that the whole thing doesn't go on for hours) and beelined to this restaurant nearby that was pumping out some amazing burger smells. I wanted a burger. Bad.

We split a salad to start, and then I didn't eat the bun on my burger (it didn't seem worth it) and ate about 3/4 of the burger patty. It came with a plate full of fries, the really thin kind, and I probably had 10 total, if that. I barely made a dent in them. I was so incredibly pleased with myself for that restraint. Kevin said, "You don't want them?" I said, "No, I want them very badly. That's the problem." But the taste of just a few was all I really needed to feel like I'd gotten to sample them.

I'm just at this point where I want to be able to control myself in situations like that, without it being a big deal. Like, I'm done hemming and hawing about it. Fries. So what. They're yummy. But I don't need the whole plate. And it doesn't have to be a thing. I'm not gonna have them all. End of story. It doesn't even need to be a discussion I have with myself. And I don't need to feel sorry for myself or create drama around it (not that I'm generally like that, but you know what I mean). Food, even terrible-for-me food, is going to be around me my entire life. I've got to continue to practice growing this kind of healthy relationship to it. It's what I want for the rest of my life. If I eat and drink a lot on a Friday night, I want to wake up on Saturday and make time to have an extra long workout. And be done with the discussion. That is how every naturally thin person I know goes about maintaining their weight. And I think part of the reason I enjoyed this weekend so much is because I did just that. I was able to indulge and then counterbalance it with smart, natural, almost-involuntary choices. I took the focus off the food at almost every turn and just practiced putting the focus back onto things that matter. And best of all, I listened so carefully to my body at every meal (Friday night aside). I stopped eating when I felt my stomach pressing on my pants a little bit. Because I knew that if I kept eating, that feeling would only increase. And that means I've eaten too much. I was able to enjoy a "cheeseburger and fries," without feeling like I'd indulged at all. I got all the flavors I wanted (the cheese, the beef, the ketchup, the mustard, the fries) but only consumed probably 400-500 calories, if that. Excellent. I felt so good about myself after that. And the scale smiled on me today.

We then went to the grocery store and stocked up on some essentials. Our cupboards have been lean lately, so it was due. We were really judicious though, because times are very tight. So we are, like everyone else right now, all about not wasting food, not buying extra crap, and being frugal with our money. We got a lot of good stuff and because we bought less than usual it wasn't such a bear to carry home.

Kev had to head out to a meeting so I spent the evening by myself, which I didn't mind. I restrung lights on the tree to make room for more lights, cleaned the bedroom, bathroom, and tidied up the living room and kitchen. I made myself a light dinner of an english muffin with peanut butter, some baby carrots, and some nuts. And I had two of these small but amazing truffles for dessert.

I did NOT get in the workout I had planned, which was unfortunate. I had really intended on doing SOMETHING, but before I knew it was 11 o'clock and I hadn't had dinner. I suppose walking around the city all day and cleaning the house at night will have to serve as my calorie-burn for yesterday. I went to sleep late again because I'd woken up so late and wasn't that tired when bedtime rolled around.

It was a really good day.

I'm excited that it's almost Christmas. I've been really itching to spend some time with my family. My grandmother's house is filled with such familiar smells and sights. And the din of the family is so comforting to me. Even if it grates on me occasionally, I feel connected to my family right now. And I'm looking forward to the holiday with them. Plus, the break from work! I have a good 12 days off. YESSSSSSSSSSSSs.

The next few weeks will be filled with parties, get-togethers, shows, rehearsals, gift exchanges, and enjoying the lovely Christmas decorations in my little house. :)

I'm gonna workout on my lunch break today. And I brought lunch from home (salad and a sweet potato). I'm sort of itchy for this workday to move quickly. It's BORING. ;)