Maybe a cupcake.

The scale was down for weigh-in this morning another half pound. I was surprised by this because I thought last week's overeating due to my little cousin being in town and this week's overeating due to several family parties was sure to catch up to me and cause a gain. Plus I think I'm in PMS stages right now. But I was surprised to see a welcome loss and I'm glad for it.

I have had consistent losses for the last 7 weeks, except for last week's maintain. It's a good streak. I would certainly attribute it to being more serious and diligent with my exercise lately (been preplanning my weekly workout schedule, doing an average of 6 days per week, varied types and lengths of cardio, light strength training, yoga, and pilates).

I'd also attribute it to being as honest as possible with myself when I write down what I've eaten in a day. The week my little cousin was here, I went over my points for the week by 95 points! I'm allowed 22 points a day and I ate beyond that by 95 points. Now 35 of those are the allotted flex points (for anyone non-WW, flex points are extra points you're given in a week to spend as you choose: all in one day, spread out over the course of the week, not at all, etc.). The other 60 points I ate were beyond what's 'allowed.' Now that's quite a bit of food - nothing to sneeze at and I certainly certainly work each week to keep that number low. (95 is an all-time high for me in recent months. That's not an average week or anything.) And I'd say the healthy majority of those points are consumed as lean proteins, whole grains, fruits and veggies, and nuts and beans. Mostly organic, whole stuff. But regardless of what I'm eating, I'd rather be totally open and honest about all the little BLT's (bites, licks, and tastes) than fudge the numbers and wonder why the hell I'm not losing at a more rapid pace.

I realize sometimes all this talk about food and exercise might sound a little over the top - that the details about what I've lost over 7 weeks, how I conduct my exercise lifestyle, what I eat, how I write everything down might sound like a mildy insane person's life. And maybe it is. But as I said yesterday, being "Fit From Within" (the name of a book I just ordered) is something that has always eluded me. So until I miraculously grow the piece of my brain chemistry that's able to simply wake up each day and automatically make the best possible choices without having to think twice about it ever, I'm probably gonna have to be someone who writes down what she eats, gives a little forethought to her workout schedule, and is accountable for it all to a scale, her pants, and a blogging community. It is what it is.

And today, what it is, is a pleased feeling that the scale was down. I actually didn't think it was gonna happen. I ate less this week than the 95-points-over week, but it was still a high number - I think maybe 85 points over? Something nuts like that? I usually do about 65 points over (that includes the 35 allowed) so I'm lucky that whatever I'm doing is working well enough that I'm still having success. Of course my goal for this upcoming week is to get that number back down to a more reasonable place, like 65 points over. I know I can't keep up with the amount of calories I've consumed in the last two weeks and still show losses. So we'll head it off at the pass and rein it in this week.

I made a workout plan for the week yesterday, as I have been doing a lot lately. I'm excited to inact it this week. There's this brand new weird contraption at the gym that is sort of a cross between a stair master, an ellipitical, and a treadmill. I can't explain it. But it doesn't have a name on it. It's got all these gears and levers and it's kinda hard to use at first but I tried it last week, finally got the hang of it, and holy SHIT. That thing - whatever it is - is a killer. My heart rate is at a steady 180 whenever I'm on it. Wild.

I'll also take a couple classes this week, pilates and yoga, and I'm looking forward to those too. It's been a couple weeks since I went to a gym class.

I have another type of goal this week which is to be very frugal financially speaking. I'm on a cash diet right now, which means my goal is to only spend a certain amount (or less, of course) each day. I'm already a little behind and have to make up for it by not spending much at all in the next few days. This means I'm eating breakfasts and lunches that I bring into work from home AND preparing dinner at home each night - another bonus for the healthy living effort, because I can control what I'm consuming. So it's a nice hand-in-hand scenario with the cash and the food.

I have a few days off in the next two weeks that are not usually my own. I have HST rehearsals every Tuesday night but we are off for the next two Tuesdays (for a handful of reasons) and I have an HST show every Saturday night but I will not have one this Saturday. So I am looking at a few days of freetime that I'm not used to. And it is definitely welcome. Of course the days are filling up fast and I already have plans on a couple of the open nights, but I don't mind since they'll be deviations from the normal routine. Tonight, my first Tuesday off, I'll take a pilates class. And the other two nights, Saturday and next Tuesday, I have parties to attend! Yay! Parties!

My 28th birthday is swiftly approaching. Friday, November 7. I'm looking forward to it, as I do every birthday, but in a moment of weakness and vulnerable PMSing last night, I cried in bed to Kevin for an hour, sobbed actually, about how I'm almost 30. Completely and utterly ridiculous, I'm beyond aware. Not necessary, not REAL (since I'm almost 28, not almost 30), and not worth my time or emotion since what exactly is 30 but a number and what exactly is "almost" but a descriptive word that means nothing tangible in my life day to day. Not to mention, it is all completely without warrant because if I'm going to waste my time focusing on numbers, 30 is a number that I know I will be proud to say is my age when the time comes. WHATEVER. Regardless, I sobbed to him last night. About that and about other stuff. And I'm allowed to because apparently I needed to. And it felt good. He was very patient and kind with me and listened carefully and asked all the right questions and offered some solutions and new perspectives and also just let me cry. He's very sweet.

I'm still in a bit of a funk about what exactly to do for my birthday. But I'll figure it out and I need to get the fuck over myself, also. PMS for sure. (I think it will be over in a matter of hours though. Then it will move to MS, remove the P.)

I'm gonna go get in some light cardio on my lunch break. I just ate a delicious turkey, cheese, spinach wrap for lunch, which I made in my kitchen this morning, and I'm already @#)%(* hungry. PMS. So I'm going to have a find a substantial snack to have after my lunchtime workout if I expect to make it to pilates class tonight.

Oh the trials and tribulations of being alive. Woe is me. Right? PuhhhLEEEZE.

I'm excited to have some quiet time to myself tonight. Kevin's going out with a friend and I think I'm gonna go home after pilates, possibly have a glass of wine, and watch my political programs. :) I might make fish for dinner! Whaaat! I'm NOT a fish eater for the most part. I am pretty finicky when it comes to fish. But I've heard tilapia is not fishy at all and they had a nice looking garlic chipotle tilapia at TJ's so I swiped it. Might try it tonight with some pilaf or brown rice and salad. We'll see.

I think I shall also find myself some kind of special sweet treat for dessert. Maybe a fancy cupcake? Maybe. :) :)