August to September

I had a really good time at home in Chicago (er, a Chicago suburb). I'm not sad to be back, necessarily, but I'm sad it had to end. I could have used several more hours in each day while we were there.

We arrived on Friday afternoon and went out to dinner with my mom, her husband, my grandparents who'd driven up from Southern Illinois for the visit, and my aunt and uncle who also live in town. It was so fun. Lots of drinking and eating. Slept like a rock that night.

Saturday morning I woke up early (as I did every day) and had some breakfast, egg sandwiches a la my mom, with the family before some of us headed off to Health Bridge, the local fancy workout facility. My cousin Kalan's boyfriend Dave drove us to the health club. (Kalan, a special ed teacher who just started her very first teaching job last week and Dave, a Scottish guy who Kalan met while studying abroad and who is currently in America to go to school, live with her parents right now to save money, the same aunt and uncle I had dinner with on Friday night.) My mom and grandparents stayed home and worked out outside or on the treadmill downstairs, but Dave, my mom's husband Tom, and Kevin and I all went to Health Bridge. I'd arranged for Kevin to have a 10:30am massage that morning, which was also happening at the health club. So we basically dropped him off at the spa section and set out about our various workouts. I did a blessed 60 minutes of cardio, 30 running, 30 on the ellipitcal, and it was nice. The facility is huge, with great equiptment and lots of options in terms of exercise. (I saw a healthy handful of people I knew from high school, though, which was a bit odd.)

After we grabbed Kevin from the spa area, who looked easily a foot taller and like a whole new person (and he loved the massage - said it set the tone for him for the whole weekend and felt great), we all headed back to my mom's house, just a 3 minute drive, and took showers, etc. Before I showered I did some light lifting and stretching in the basement while my mom lifted weights too.

That evening, after an afternoon spent running errands with my mom and grandmother while Kevin hung with my stepdad back at the homestead, was a big BBQ at my mom's house with the whole family. My mom, her hub, my grandparents, the aunt and uncle from Friday's dinner, Kalan and Dave, Kalan's sister - my cousin - Mallory, my other uncle who lives in downtown Chicago and drove in for the evening, his wife, and their twin 7 year olds - a boy and a girl. And of course Kevin and me. My mom, with the help of her husband, oldest brother, and sister in law, prepared a big spread with tons of great BBQ food. We got drunk on whiskey sours and beer and I ate way more than I needed to. We all talked and laughed and told stories well into the evening. I crashed before the party ended that night, I was so tired.

The next morning, Sunday, I woke up early again, ready for another great day. We had plans to meet everyone for breakfast at a local place. I'd never been there before, but I wasn't terribly impressed. We all met around 9, everyone from the party the night before, and enjoyed a nice big meal. My grandparents left to drive back to their house, 5 hours away, after breakfast. My mom and stepdad and Kevin and I headed back home to relax.

I talked Kevin into taking me shopping for some stuff I needed and he was a great sport about it. We had a nice afternoon alone together, driving around the suburbs, people watching and price comparing. It was tiring, naturally, but productive.

My mom and her hub went mini-golfing with the twins and their dad that afternoon, then the twins and their dad drove back to the city and my mom and Tom were home when we got there with all our stuff (new sneaks, new bras, and a new pair of jeans! wahoo!) Kevin and I made a big spinach salad for lunch and then couched it out for a while. We were debating about whether or not to go down to Jazz Fest in the city that evening - my mom was planning to take us, but by the time the evening rolled around she was just so exhausted from everything we'd already done that weekend - and I don't blame her - so she gave us the option of going alone, but we ended up deciding to just stay in town and relax. The city and live music would have been nice, but we live in a big city and we've heard some good live music this summer already. New York is not Chicago by any means and it would have been nice to be downtown, but still - we were on vacation from all crazy hectic city life.

We did decide to go to the nearby park, called Veterans Acres, which is actually this huge forest preserve type area with tons of wildlife and different foresty areas of all varietys - and LOTS of hills - to go for a run. We did a light ten minute lifting session at the house before we left and then drove to the park. It was a nice 40 minute jog, but it was HARD. The hills at this place are unreal and every time you conquer one you feel like the next one is already staring you down. We covered lots of different terrain in those 40 mins, jogging most of the way. We had so much fun together, enjoying nature and taking in the sights and smells. It was pretty great. We ran up some huge stairs that are built into the side of a hill at the end of the workout, the back down them, then up again to finish. It was a really good workout that made me feel out of shape! Those hills were killer. My mom says that even when she's in great shape (she just had foot surgery so she hasn't been able to run for the last couple months) that park is a hard workout for her. And my mom is an athlete who rarely complains about tough workouts. Kevin and I are both still sore from it. But we both wore our new running shoes and they held up perfectly.

We got home, showered, (our ankles were filthy from all the dirt we ran through), and sat down to Chinese take out with my mom and stepdad. It was yummy and we had a nice chat over dinner. We all watched some tv after that, then my parents went to bed. Kevin and I debated going to a movie, but we were both sleepy so instead we made ourselves decadant sundaes with low calorie ice cream and some other yummy crap left over from the BBQ. We crashed into bed yet again.

Woke up Monday and went to the gym again. I did some pilates and some cardio and then we headed home to shower, etc. in time for a 10am brunch at my aunt's house. My mom offered to let me drive her stick shift, two-seater, convertible sports car, which she just bought at a STEAL (like, so so cheap) and is in great condition. It was soooo fun. I haven't driven stick in years and it came right back to me. I had to be careful because I don't technically have a drivers license but it was a quick trip.

Brunch at my aunt and uncle's was yummy, lots of horribly decadent things. Mimosas, quiches, pigs wrapped in bacon (OH GOD - I HAD FIVE!), sausage biscuits and gravy, some pecan french toast casserole heart attack thing - it was unreal. I had much more than I needed to, but was still restrained and loaded my plate up with fruit too. We ran a few errands after that, and then packed ourselves into the car to drive to a nearby outdoor bar/music venue on the river called the Broken Oar. It was fun, HILARIOUS people watching, okay live music, and beers-during-the-day. It was such a hot, sunny day. Can't beat that. It was a great way to spend our last few hours in town.

We came home, slightly hungover, and had some lunch while watching tv. We packed up the car soon after that with all our stuff, had to force that suitcase closed since we acquired some stuff during the stay, and my mom and her husband drove us to the airport around 6pm. The sun was on its way down, it was still hot, almost 90, and we had a nice 40 minute drive.

I was sad to leave. It was definitely bittersweet to be heading home. We had some time to kill at the airport so we popped into a bookshop and I was fighting back tears the whole time we were browsing. Kev was a champ about it, of course. And hugged and kissed me and let me talk it all out while my eyes welled up. He's the best.

The plane ride home was interesting to say the least. I never love to fly. I don't really mind it, but I sometimes feel a bit worried during take off and landing. I assume that's the case for most people and I try not to let it bother me while I'm on the plane. Well, the girl next to me, who was acting 'normal' in all other respects, turned into a complete nut when the plane took off. I'm talking freaking out. Like, panic attack style. And she was sitting all the way on the inside. I felt awful for her. She was so panicked. It was crazy. She kept looking out the window, like getting really really close to the window and peering out of it, and then freaking out and slamming it shut. Grabbing onto the walls and the chair arms every time there was a bump or pressure shifted. It was really stressful. Her energy was making me crazed myself. I couldn't figure out why I was feeling so jumpy and then I realized that this girl was making me think my life was in grave danger every six seconds. Everyone else on the plane was completely calm and then there was this poor girl having a meltdown. It was a bit intense. It made me wonder why she ever flies to begin with.

We got home late, after an otherwise fun plane ride enjoying each other's company. And it was equally so nice to realize that we didn't have to cab to separate apartments or say goodbye for the night once we landed. We live together! :)

The weekend was so nice for us to reconnect. My family really likes Kevin and he really likes them too. They're a fun bunch, but they can be overwhelming at times. He just takes it all in stride.

And Kevin is FINALLY done with his project! He was literally on the phone wrapping things up on Friday afternoon as he was packing and cleaning out the cat litter before the trip. Ha! The poor guy. But he's DONE now. And he said this weekend was like rehab for him. I'm so glad. He will hopefully have some time to himself for a while now. He's going to the US Open with his dad tonight and will be able to spend today relaxing, I hope.

This trip was really good for me too. I needed to get out of town and clear my head. I've been so angry at New Yorkers lately, hating (hating) the girl who sits next to me at work, hating the commute some mornings, hating certain personalities that are all over this city, hating how tense my shoulders get after a day at my office job, hating how cramped things can feel and how tightly packed my life is. And all that hate is never a good thing.

But the trip was good. Kevin and I had some great chats about what we want for our lives and our careers and how we hope to spend our time and money while we're still young, childless, and independent. And I have returned to the city with a slightly renewed feeling. It certainly wasn't a huge mental overhaul, but it was definitely what I needed. I feel not so pissed off at certain people in my life as I was when I left, not so fed up with certain circumstances, I feel like the stuff I'm not looking forward to in the coming days and weeks won't be so awful now, and I feel like I was able to reconnect to my family in an way that always makes me feel rooted. I love them all very much.

I'm excited for fall, for the weather to get cooler and for new activities to present themselves. September is a lovely month. My cousin Kalan is coming to visit for a long weekend in October and she's never been here before. So that will be awesome. We're staying in town for Thanksgiving to be with Kevin's family, but at Christmas time Kev and I are going to visit my grandparents in Southern, IL and then a bunch of us are going to Florida for a few days. Should be great.

I still feel a bit stuck in my current reality. Stuck in this job and other things I haven't felt like doing lately that I still have to do. But I've set some goals for myself and a rough timeline for leaving this office assistant thing I've been doing since I graduated. And I know forward motion is happening. And I'm so excited to watch the unfolding the next chapter of my life.

In terms of health - lots of food consumed. I was a bit OCD about it all through Saturday night. Mentioned it to Kevin and he was basically like, "RELAX." So I decided to take the weekend off from counting points. It's been eons since I've done that. It was nice. I know I ate and drank much more than I needed to, but at least I wasn't all worrying about tallying it up all the time, which always causes me to miss the moment. And I definitely made tremendously good choices too. I could have done much worse damage than I did. Plus, the three solid days of great workouts - not too shabby.

Today I'll make a menu plan for dinners and go to the grocery store after my yoga class. I'll take an 8:15 yoga class tonight (I've really missed yoga since I haven't gotten to take a class in about a week - I'm quickly becoming an addict) and probably get in 30 minutes of cardio before the class. Also I'll hopefully make some dinner at home (the kitchen is all clean, thanks to my darling BF who cleaned it before we left!) and couch it out. To bed early, also, would be ideal.

Things are going to rev back up in the coming weeks. But I can say no when I need to. I'm going to work on not judging myself for my need to be in solitude sometimes.