Happy As Clam - July Edition

I'm sitting in my bedroom in shorts and a tankini top; I'm about to go outside and read Harry Potter in the sun, only after I eat the brown rice sushi I bought at Go Wasabi on Ditmars. My hair is currently air-drying because I was instructed to show up at my 5pm hair appointment with my hair down, not pulled back, with minimal product in it, so that they can see what they're "working with," she said. Have I mentioned that this salon specializes in curly hair? And that I've wanted to go here for probably four years? And that I need a haircut badly right now and I have a good feeling about this one? Oh and I just got back from my massage appointment. Holy. Fuck. That was pretty much actual heaven. I feel so good right now. She did 45 minutes of reflexology which is apparently just some sort of magical manipulation of every single muscle in my feet - that was unreal. Then she did 30 minutes of incredible back work. I died, came back to life, died again, and solved world hunger - I was so zen. Oh and I went to sleep at 11pm last night and slept for 12 hours in my freshly laundered bed with my kitten by my side. Oh and I bought new earrings on sale at the spa which are adorable. Oh and this morning I organized a shitload of money stuff and paid some bills that desperately needed paying. Oh before going to sleep last night I did laundry and folded all. my. clothes.

This is the best day.

I'm finally using the massage gift certificate Todd gave me in OCTOBER tomorrow. And I'm getting my hair cut some place fancy. And tonight I'm doing laundry and doing nothing and relaaaaaxing bigtime. The ol' bf is out of town for the night and as much as I'd love to go get my groove on in town, I'll probably be asleep by 10:30. It's pathetic and delicious.

Booked my tix home for Christmas today. My cousin Trisha is getting married on December 29 so I'll be in the midwest for a whole week this holiday. Interesting. My cousins, Mallory, Trisha, Kalan, and Leia are my mom's brother's four girls. My mom and her brother have grown extremely close in their adulthood and we five girls were very close growing up too. I love them like sisters and they treat me like one. As the wedding gets closer I get more excited about seeing Trisha get married.

I just googled myself.

It felt weird.

I'm wondering how much I can talk about work on here and not get someday fired for it. I'm paranoid about being fired. Being fired sucks. It feels shitty.

Yo, so, I've come home from a day of this life and, look, it is a LOT. I always say one day at this place feels like two days. And today at the end of the day I was physically exhausted. No joke. I could feel it. Yikes.

I had a fight with my manager today. A fight. We were mad at each other. And she was mean to me. There were tears. It was...I'm exhausted. I'm just exhausted.

I feel so solitary in this experience. I feel like no one can relate to my unique point of view right now. And I am juggling a lot - not just schedule, obligation, or commitment wise, but psychologically. It's a lot. This woman I fought with today, my relationship with her has been a draining factor at times. But it's also this environment, the hours are just long here. People work hard. And I'm learning a lot about myself. And I'm working out on my goddammed lunch breaks.

And it's ripping me up that this is all I want to talk about for the first ten minutes of seeing anyone I know and love. Poor Kevin. He said he owes me for the years he talked to me about his job. He did, however, point out that he didn't leave me 2 minute long voicemails about his job. Which I did leave him. Today. So.

WHAT ELSE! Life! Comedyyyyy, my loving frieeeends, my pretty caaaat. Things else are okay. I don't have time for them not to be. I'm going to see SidViscious! tonight, which is always so fun and I'm glad to be going out and seeing some humans.

Priorities have become, in no particular order, sleep, exercise, comedy, loved ones, job, cat. That's all I really know right now. Oh and I'm rereading Potter 6 in prepartion for 7 which sits on my dresser. It's still summer, dammit. And I can't wait for the weekend.


p.s. I miss my life on the internet. I miss you, Internet Life. But we probably needed this break.

"We're doing the best we can!"

laying on couch. watching kathy griffin show. eating donut. drinking iced coffee. needed this so bad.

what a dumb day.

except for one really cool part.

and a good workout.

and sushi for lunch.

and i'm so tired.

and i'm looking forward to conquering tomorrow.

Monday? Feck.

"Honey, what you don't understand is that I want to talk to someone here in the United States of America."

Someone at work was calling their phone company and the call was outsourced. I mean, how could I not laugh?

I am so aware of trying to be careful about my blog content these days. I could see myself getting swiftly fired from this place for writing basically anything at all on my blog. In fact, I could see myself getting fired for writing stuff that doesn't even have anything to do with work. And I could certainly see myself getting fired for the very paragraph I'm writing right now.

But life's too short, ya know?

Current status is as follows: I'm cold because of the rainy weather and a little grumpy because I have cramps. I'm glad to be working because the money is nice and I blew some of it at Target this weekend which was fun. I'm not glad to be working because I miss my boyfriend who has had to put up with my falling asleep at what sometimes feels like 8:30pm and my being tired all the time and napping sporadically. But I have about ten days off from anything HST related. It will be nice to have a little break. And I'm really enjoying improv stuff right now. Had a good productive enlightening practice yesterday and will have another one tonight. As soon as I can afford it, I'm getting new headshots. Harry Potter warms me.

I love this photo of Sara...

It breaks my heart

that I haven't blogged in so long. Keith.

I have accepted a new permanent job at the company I was temping at last time I posted. The 12 month gig kept getting pushed back and pushed back, so I was gonna keep temping. And I wasn't really looking hard for something permanent because I wanted the flexibility that temping offered so that I could focus on comedy, but the boss at this latest place offered me way too much money for me to turn down and I felt obligated (to my bank account and outstanding debts) to take the money.

I'll work here for as long as I can tolerate it. And the thing is, for now at least, I sorta don't mind it as much as you'd think I would. Don't get me wrong: the hours are long, I have to be here at 8am every day and I'm the opposite of a morning person so that blows, and the work itself, although not terribly difficult or mentally challenging, can definitely be exhausting at times. I leave work completely numb after working basically non-stop during the ten plus hour workday. I started to find pockets to carve out a little internet time here and there - then I found out the boss can see every single website we visit and even read to whom we've sent gmails and the subjects of the gmails, all with some fancy securty software he has. So.

But here's what I tell myself: I'm making some money. Good. I'll pay off the minor debts I have and be at $0. I'll take an hour lunch every day that I possibly can, because I must. And one of my gym locations is literally in the same building. I've gone twice already. It's pretty ridiculous how perfect that part of it is. The first day I was already changed into gym clothes and on the treadmill 120 seconds after leaving my desk, I said, "This is awesome." I'm going to utilize that as much as I can - score a plus one for mental sanity. And the only other sector that's on my mind is my comedy. The first few weeks I worked there I was late for, missed, or slept through three different comedy obligations due to adjusting to this hecticness. This week I did a lot better. So that's got to remain a huge priority. I'm only working this job so I can keep doing that stuff.

Hopefully it will be managable for a while. The structure isn't my enemy, I think.

All else is good. Busy busy busy - shows practices rehearsals shows meetings socializing etc. I'm wiped out. But I'm sleeping hard when I can and that feels nice.

Oh and hey Kevin! Yeah, Kevin. Hey you! I like this picture of us and I'm putting it on my blog. And right now, I'm writing to you. You can take it up with me later. ;)